Real estate website Trulia takes their mission seriously. The website touts its expertise on everything “from neighborhood insights to how to start your home search”. Recently they went all out to prove they are the authority on those insights by preparing a report on “The Most Appetizing cities for U.S. Zombies”
Trulia based their analysis on which locations had:
Higher hospital density – Zombies would have quick access to defenseless “food”
More congestion – Making it difficult for humans to run from zombies.
Fewer hardware stores – Making it difficult for humans to protect themselves in an attack.
Higher walk scores – Making it easier for “walkers” to get around.
The top cities in the report were:
1. Honolulu, Hawaii
2. New York, New York
3. Newark, New Jersey
4. Boston, Massachusetts
5. Washington, DC
6. San Francisco, California
7. Miami, Florida
8. Orange County, California
9. Los Angeles, California
10. Seattle, Washington
Chicago, Denver, and Portland also ranked high on the “Don’t Be Caught Here if The Walking Dead Ever Becomes Reality” meter.
Not everyone is taking their ranking in the report as a bad thing. Honolulu Magazine takes the ranking in stride.
“We always thought we’d do well, living on one of the most remote islands in the world. Or maybe that’s the problem—there’s nowhere to run. Once again, it’s location, location, location.”
Maybe that’s because they already have a plan in place for the Zombie Apocalypse.
“If the unthinkable ever did happen, and Beretania and King streets were filled with the shuffling, moaning undead, we know exactly where we’d hole up: MAKIKI SAFEWAY! Think about it: The building is on stilts, so you’d be safely off the ground level, with only a couple of stairway access points to defend. And hey, it’s a supermarket, fully stocked with all the food, medicine and booze you’d need to stay alive and happy until the cavalry arrived. Let the hardcore survivalist types run for the back of Palolo Valley—we’re gonna stay where the beer is.”