Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Tyler Perry’s Why Did My Studios Burn Down
Kentucky Derby this weekend. I bet the mainstream media covers it like a horserace.
I hope Jessica Simpson’s daughter has a great first day in college today.
Newt Gingrich suspended his presidential campaign in order to devote his time to fighting the evil fat-free mayonnaise corporations.
Exclusive: Work is being done on next Call of Duty game. It will take place in a war-time setting, and should be announced within 18 months.
I hope the mom who brought her 5-year-old into the tanning booth learned her lesson. Next time, she’ll leave her alone in the car.
So wait, if Roger Clemens gets off, does Andy Pettitte get credited with a save?
Jaleel White was eliminated from “Dancing with Stars” last night. I tried to tell him to go as Stephan but noooooooo.
My favorite moment in the last Game of Thrones was when Khaleesi decides to bootstrap her ocean-crossing startup instead of taking VC.
No one was hurt in the fire at Tyler Perry’s studios, in fact, he just signed a deal to produce five more nearly identical blazes.
Newt Gingrich bows out of Presidential race to focus on being the world’s largest high-fructose corn syrup storage silo.
Google Street View cars have been monitoring your private Wi-Fi signals… Beautiful. Unethical. Dangerous. Wish I’d thought of it.
Jugglers are Earth’s first line of defense against small, spherical aliens.
Sometimes I feel like a fat guy trapped in fat guy’s body.