Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Today we see a lot of tweets about the Iowa Caucus. We also find a compelling theory regarding Intelligent Design.
Enjoy!
@funnyordie
Funny Or Die“Excited to see what’s about to happen in Iowa!” is a sentence you only get to use once every 4 years.
2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@firstworldme
First World ProblemsOnly 102 out of 494 facebook friends wished me happy birthday. #firstworldproblems 3 hours ago via twitterfeed · powered by @socialditto
@pourmecoffee
pourmecoffeeAll political and media people are in Iowa. If we could somehow fence it off, this is our chance to start a new society. 1 day ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto
@Andy_Richter
Andy RichterTheological Question: If Intelligent Design is a real thing then why do I have such a surplus of sack skin? 14 hours ago via Twitter for iPad · powered by @socialditto
@ApocalypseHow
Rob KutnerI drove my hybrid to Trader Joe’s to buy kale in my mesh NPR bag. If I were any whiter, I’d be transparent. 2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@TheBosha
The BoshaIf you have a therapist, a plastic surgeon and a lot of debt there’s probably not much you need to thank your parents for. 7 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@BorowitzReport
Andy BorowitzI’m not trying to start a Twitter rumor, but when you tweet about Rick Santorum remember to use the hashtag #sexdungeon 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@DepressedDarth
Darth VaderI’m excited, the leader of another evil empire has joined twitter, welcome Rupert Murdoch. 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@meganamram
Megan AmramThat cop says I should go to jail for smoking PCP in my car, but I say that cop should go to jail for being a saber-toothed tiger. 21 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@alan_tudyk
alan tudykIowa caucus tonight! I can’t wait for the bikini contest. I bet Romney is the only one who practices any body hair management. 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@Tom_Bergeron
Tom BergeronNewt’s calling Romney a liar. Santorum says Ron Paul is disgusting. What is this? Real Housewives of the Iowa Caucus? 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto