Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Before Augusta accepts women maybe they ought to get rid of the name Masters.
Beyonce isn’t REALLY on Tumblr until she starts reblogging Community GIFs.
Now that Kanye is dating Kim he’s found a bush that DOES care about black people
Sure, Google glasses looks cool, but I’m holding out for the Zune monocle
In breaking news, Charles Manson has selected Nancy Grace to represent him in his parole hearing next week. “I love the evil in her eyes.”
Interesting Sports Fact: when the Chicago Cubs start 1-0 or 0-1 they have gone on to not win a World Series for the past 103 years.
Remember the game where you would take turns yelling, “Penis!” in public? Life was so simple before 9/11.
I think when Jesus died for our sins, he wasn’t fully aware of some of the shit we’d be getting into.
Oh, you’re in 8th grade & you get drunk every night? Please share it with Facebook so everybody can see what a bright future you have.
Shhhhh. Masters golfers are trying to putt.
Pretty cool that Beyonce’s publicist finally joined Twitter!
WOMAN GO TO JAIL FOR DRIVE AND TEXT WITH BABY ON LAP! CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT? SHE COULD HAVE SPELL WORD WRONG!
A new report says the Civil War death toll is actually 20% higher. Especially in parts of the South where it’s still going on.
Jim Marshall, inventor of the Marshall amp has died. His funeral begins at 1 and it goes to 11.
