Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Today, we get a couple of tweets regarding today’s numerical anomaly, 11/11/11. We also
discuss alphabetical showering and get a great tip from the fake AP Stylebook.
Enjoy!
@DRUNKHULK
DRUNK HULKTIME TO TURN DAY UP TO 11!
17 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@rydontcare
ryanneMy day feels more organized when I wash my body parts alphabetically. 7 hours ago via Tweetbot for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@firstworldme
First World ProblemsMy Skyrim pre-order didn’t arrive on release day. #firstworldproblems 8 hours ago via twitterfeed · powered by @socialditto
@anthonyjeselnik
Anthony JeselnikThis Penn State scandal is disgusting. Every detail makes me want to take a long, hot shower. 3 hours ago via TwitBird · powered by @socialditto
@thesulk
Alec Sulkin“Okay, here’s the deal…” (FDR) 6 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@TheFakeESPN
The Fake ESPNTebow and Broncos are working to implement an option-style offense. Options include running the ball or running the ball. 4 hours ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto
@FakeAPStylebook
Fake AP StylebookPut quotation marks around every mention of “Bible,” just to see what happens. 3 hours ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto
@Kris_Humphries
Not Kris Humphries“@KimKardashian: 11/11/11 11:11 make a wish!” I wish I was black so you wouldn’t divorce me 🙁 4 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@JordyHamrick
JordanMaroon 5 would be more useful to me if they were an ingredient in my soft drink. 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@kellyoxford
kelly oxford“This is so cool!!!” – how to ruin a threesome 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@DannyZuker
Danny ZukerThanks to all the brave men and women like my dad whose service has allowed me to live my life like a total pussy. #HappyVeteransDay 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@EliBraden
Eli BradenDoes Veterans Day fall on 11/11/11 every year? 50 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@MaxScoville
Max ScovilleBilly Crystal would be a great name for a meth dealer. 20 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@MrPeeker
A J FranksFB makes HS reunions awkward. Hey, I haven’t seen you 20 years. So how was that nap you took this afternoon? 2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@Braunger
Matt BraungerIt’s amazing how even the phrase “But….but….raping little boys!” still doesn’t win an argument with some Catholics or Penn State fans. 31 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto