Is Celebrity Tweeting The Biggest Grift Ever?

This next piece should make those of you struggling to populate your Twitter account with followers feel over the moon; or, perhaps sad enough to end it all. What we have is an estimation of how much certain celebrities make in relation to their tweets, and the information is pretty disheartening, especially for those of you who, you know, are actually trying to create a useful Twitter profile.

While there have been rumors of various amounts given to celebrities for their incredible insights on life — Charlie Sheen comes to mind — thanks to the Vulture section of NYMag.com, there’s even more information about how much certain stars make for their Twitter insight, and man, it’s just depressing.

It’s also clear we are nation of trend-following groupies who apparently want to bask in the glow of the “elite,” otherwise known as those who “leak” sex tapes (Kim Kardashian), make marginal rap music (Snoop Dog), and have remained in the popular for reasons we can’t quite comprehend (Paula Abdul). The numbers revealed by the post are pretty staggering.

Thankfully, however, these “celebrities” are not being paid for every tweet, just those that endorse a certain product. So there’s some relief in that respect, but then again, are you going to buy a product just because it was tweeted about on Kim Kardashian’s inane Twitter stream?

If so, then you’re part of problem.

Anyway, the downfall of society aside, what do these celebrities make for their 140 characters of genius? The numbers may surprise you:

Kim Kardashian – $10,000 per tweet
Snoop Dog – $8,000 per
Paula Abdul – $5000 per
Whitney Port (who?) – $2,500 per

The article features a quote from the CEO Of Ad.ly — Arnie Gullov-Singh — who helped perpetuate this madness. Naturally, Gullov-Singh thinks its a wonderful thing, “Consumers react positively to organic authentic messaging.” With that piece of knowledge in mind, let’s take a look at what, exactly, the kind of content these beacons of creativity are responsible for.

After reading some of these moments of sheer genius, please refrain from taking drastic measures that could result in the police intervening. Lastly, these examples won’t be featuring any endorsed tweets. Instead, I’m just going to highlight the kind of content these paragons of talent offer, allowing you to decide whether or not these kind of tweets are worth, well, any amount of money.

We’ll start with the “amazing” Kim Kardashian:

In other news, Kim K still uses a Blackberry. Maybe RIM could make her a full-time endorser. Now for Snoop-A-Loop:

Next up is Paula Abdul. At first, I thought the point had been made, but no “Imma” make sure you get it, this time, with what looks like an endorsement tweet:

Pepsi really paid 5 grand for that? No wonder the economy sucks. As for Whitney Port:

I just hope those aren’t the kind of tweets she gets $2,500 per for. In other news, it’s clear I pursued the wrong career. While the tech industry has treated me good, clearly, I needed to get famous and then sit back and make money from useless 140-character posts.