Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Today the Twitterverse is aflutter with the iPhone 4S. We also learn about the ironies of National Dessert Day and figure out why the original “Charlie’s Angels” show succeeded in the first place.
Enjoy!
@DanaJGould
Dana Gould“The Thing” is a prequel to “The Thing” which is a remake of “The Thing” which is about a monster that duplicates itself.
6 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@BorowitzReport
Andy BorowitzI’m not sure how the average American would differentiate National Dessert Day from any other day. 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@God_Damn_Batman
The BatmanRobin stood in line all morning for his iPhone 4S. Which made “accidentally” running it over with the Batpod so much funnier. 1 hour ago via Batcomputer · powered by @socialditto
@scullymike
Mike ScullyI haven’t read any recent government studies, but I can only assume it’s still hard out there for a pimp. 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto
@robdelaney
rob delaneyDon’t necessarily nominate me for sainthood, but I just gave a VERY ugly woman directions. 4 hours ago via Twitter for Android · powered by @socialditto
@jondaly
Jon DalyWatching a 1944 biopic of Mark Twain on TMC. I never knew he spoke completely in famous Mark Twain quotes. 12 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@JordyHamrick
JordanIf you’re ever feeling down about yourself, head to your local GameStop and ask the workers how they feel about dragons. 5 hours ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto
@Justin_Stangel
Justin StangeliPhone 4s activation problems on AT&T but not Verizon and Sprint. AT&T couldn’t be reached for comment because they are on AT&T 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
@Smethanie
StephanieNever have I understood crack addicts more than in the 30 minutes I was without a phone while upgrading to the 4S. 2 hours ago via Favstar.FM · powered by @socialditto
@juliussharpe
Julius SharpeNot surprised “Charlie’s Angels” was cancelled. The original only worked was because constant free porn wasn’t available. 2 hours ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto
@firstworldme
First World ProblemsAs I’ve grown older it has become more time consuming to locate my birth year in a drop down menu. #firstworldproblems 1 hour ago via twitterfeed · powered by @socialditto
@JoshMalina
Joshua Malina9 pizzas, 9 toppings, 9 dollars. THAT’S a plan I can get behind. 3 hours ago via phnx · powered by @socialditto
@meredithxoreid
Meredith ReidI feel lazier than the guy who drew the Japanese flag. 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto
Matt SmithEver been so drunk that you cooked a pizza at 20 degrees for 350 minutes? 20 hours ago via Twitter for Android · powered by @socialditto