WebProNews

Tag: YouTube

  • The Doug Hutchison-Courtney Stodden Drama Continues

    A little over a week ago, the internet was set ablaze with a story of love, glamor, and incredibly creepy undertones. Apparently people find it strange when a 51-year-old actor marries a 16-year-old model, who woulda thunk it?

    When the news broke that Lost‘s Doug Hutchison had wed the much younger Courtney Stodden, two distinct trends popped up on Twitter. The first group was simply shocked by the age difference. Many thought the marriage was improper, even disgusting according to some. Some speculated that the 16-year-old Stodden had simply done it to become famous. (Whatever would make you think that?) A few defended their right to be in love, if that was actually the case – her parents did sign off on the whole thing.

    The other camp questioned the fact that Stodden was actually 16. Looking through pictures of the girl, it is clear why many had this thought. She looks quite mature for a 16-year-old. Here’s a reminder of why the age was such a debated topic –

    Now it looks like the debate might be over. E! has obtained a copy of her birth certificate, and if you believe it to be accurate, then there is no longer any doubt. Stodden was in fact born August 29th, 1994 at 3:32 p.m. That would make her just shy of 17. Check out the birth certificate below (and please comment on that terrible font) –

    I doubt people will be scrutinizing this birth certificate quite as ferociously as another one from recent memory.

    In my previous article, I noted that this story had made the interwebs seem even more brutal than usual. Comments on her YouTube videos ranged from “you are a terrible singer, but you’d make an A+ porn star” to “you will not make it in the music industry, sorry.” With the uncovering of the birth certificate, Twitter hasn’t gotten any nicer –

    Usually don’t care about this stuff, but srsly – Courtney Alexis Stodden looks like a (badly aged) 45-year-old with work done to compensate 2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    If Courtney Stodden is a day under 25, I’ll eat the hat that’s hiding my boner. 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Courtney Stodden doesn’t look like she’s 16. Likeeee…..Ahhhhh. Genetic Freak. 9 hours ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto

    No fucking way is Doug Hutchison’s teen bride 16 years old!!!?! I refuse to believe this, even though I just saw her birth certificate! 16 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    “We’re very much in love and want to get the message out that true love can be ageless,” said Hutchison.

    Ageless or not, it will be hard to escape the scrutinizing minds of the internet.

    Does true love really have no bounds? Let us know how you feel.

  • Ambient Dial-Up Modem Music Is Terrifying, Awesome

    The internet loves to slow stuff down. Sure, people have been speeding up songs for years, and yes the chipmunked versions of songs are quite funny (for 30 seconds). But the real beauty of messing with a track’s length comes when you slow it down to super slow speeds. Five minute tracks become hour long epics, and total crap can become a transcendent masterpiece.

    The slowed-down music trend, or “Ambient” tracks, first became incredibly popular when a version of Justin Bieber’s “U Smile” stretched out to 800% slower became a viral sensation. Some didn’t believe that it was really the same song, only slower – but it totally was. If you sped it back up, you would be met with, well, the entirely unimpressive original Bieber song.

    One YouTube user describes the Ambient Bieber as “a water bomb exploding, a droplet of water landing in a puddle, the sunrise through to sunset, waves crashing, a hummingbird in flight, a panning view of our galaxy.” OK, buddy, it’s pretty neat but…

    Today (with a hat tip to Vulture) I bring you the techie version of the Ambient music movement. Using PaulStretch, the free software that many of these ambient songs are made with, YouTube user Darkfalky has slowed a dial-up modem down 700%. The results? Creepy, epic, ambient genius. Check it out below –

    Doesn’t this bring you back to the days before broadband? It’s nerdy nostalgia, with a musical twist.

    Ambient versions of tons of songs from all different genres exist on YouTube. A quick search of “Ambient” or “slowed down” will net results for slower versions of Taylor Swift, Movie Theme Music, Reading Rainbow Theme Song, Daft Punk, Slipknot, and so many more. Of course, listening to one of these tracks is time consuming – but it is called Ambient, remember? Put it on while you meditate, cook dinner, or walk your dog.

    The coolest one that I’ve ever had the patience to sit through is this version of the Jurassic Park Theme Music, played at 1000 times slower than normal. As described by a Soundcloud user,

    “There was a well documented version of Justin Biebers ‘U Smile’ by musician Nick Pittsinger, who used the software ‘PaulStretch’ to slow the track by 800% to achieve a similar effect. That seems to have ignited a bit of a craze for this sort of thing, however, although this may not be an original idea, it is a fantastic piece of music, both at its original tempo and its new state.”

    Check it out (if you have the time) –

    Jurassic Park Theme (1000% Slower) by birdfeeder

  • Greenpeace Lampoons Volkswagen With YouTube Videos

    Remember the Star Wars/Volkswagen Super Bowl commercial? The one with the cute kid dressed as Darth Vader trying to Force-start the Passat? Sure you do, but if not, check out the lead video. The commercial was quite popular, so much so, it won a few “best commercial of the Super Bowl” designations. With that in mind, if you’re a environmentally-conscious group looking to ridicule and call out a company for what’s perceived to be practices that endanger the environment, comparing them to an evil empire, the Darth Vader commercial is a good place to start.

    That’s just what Greenpeace did with a pair of videos, painting Volkswagen as the Empire for their failure to improve its poor environmental record. Over at the GreenpeaceUK site, they have a page devoted to the movement, asking users to “Join the Rebellion” against the Empire that is Volkswagen.

    From the site’s description:

    Our home—Earth—is in trouble. VW opposes key environmental laws we need if we’re going to stop our planet going the way of Alderaan (bye bye). But all is not lost. We feel the good in Volkswagen.

    All of us in the Rebellion are calling on Volkswagen to turn away from the Dark Side and give our planet a chance.

    The page even has a link to Greenpeace’s full report on Volkswagen’s track record with the environment. A snippet of the introduction text gives readers an idea of where Greenpeace is going with their protestations:

    The Volkswagen Group is the largest car maker in Europe. It has repeatedly claimed that it wants to be a‘green’ company, but has so far failed to live up to its green ambitions. It has been slow to make its fleet more efficient, despite having developed the technology to do so, and has actively worked to impede strong European climate policies. The company must change.

    The highlight of Greenpeace’s Volkswagen protest comes from the videos they made to get their point across. To do so, Greenpeace mocked the incredibly-popular Darth Vader kid commercial (over 40 million views on YouTube) with not one, but two satirical videos:


    The United Kingdom arm of the Greenpeace movement also changed their Twitter page to match this new promotion, which they’ve also been tweeting about:

    The force is strong with our VW film. Most shared ‘ad’ in past 24 hours. http://bit.ly/myS89F #vwdarkside 7 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    Volkswagen: do or do not. There is no try. http://bit.ly/iL1N35 #vwdarkside 9 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    43,000 people joined the rebellion so far. And it’s not even the end of Day 1. #vwdarkside 23 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    Currently, the number of people who’ve joined Greenpeace’s anti-Volkswagen movement is up to 89,112 people.

    The most surprising aspect of Greenpeace’s movement is the liberal use of Star Wars material. The protest page is littered with things like “Your Jedi training page,” and “FAQ / FQA with Yoda;” leading this particular writer to believe George Lucas is on board with the protest. Considering just how protective he is over the “Star Wars” brand, and anything related to it, if Greenpeace doesn’t have Lucas’ permission, these pages won’t last very long at all.

    Furthermore, the fact that Lucas allowed Volkswagen to use likenesses from the Star Wars universe casts doubt on the idea he’d let Greenpeace use the same kind of look and feel to protest Volkswagen. At some point, we’ll get to find out just how strong the Force in Greenpeace really is.

  • Supreme Court Video Game Decision Gets Animated

    Okay, let’s just say that Next Media Animation is a treasure of the interwebs.

    The Taiwanese animation company’s timely video enactments of America’s top news have become staples of YouTube. The breadth of what they choose to cover is impressive. Just today they animated the New York gay marriage bill, Obama’s YouTube channel, and Lady Gaga news.

    And then there’s this, which I can only describe as transcendent.

    NMA has decided to give their interpretation of yesterday’s landmark Supreme Court decision about the sale of violent video games to minors. In that decision, the SCOTUS ruled a California state law prohibiting the sale of mature games to children unconstitutional.

    Writing for the majority, Justice Antonin Scalia ruled that the state law does not fall into line with the first amendment and that video games, like books and films, deserve freedom of speech protection. Not only is this a win for the video game industry, but also a win for first amendment advocates everywhere. Opponents of the SCOTUS ruling say that the games are obscene and the government should be allowed to regulate their distribution.

    NMA’s take on the whole thing is worth watching for its use of the violence motif even during the Supreme Court hearing sequences. Add an American flag, some kids and Grand Theft Auto and this becomes gold.

    They are also able to point out the strange disconnect that we, in America, have about sex and violence in a 60 second clip. One is okay, while the other is highly restricted. Swell commentary, NMA. Swell.

    Check it out below –

  • Tau Day Sweeps The Internet, Gets Its Own Soundtrack

    It all started when Dr. Michael Hartl suggested that the cake pi is a lie last year.

    Hartl put “The Tau Manifesto” online last year, just in time for Tau Day, which is June 28th. Or 6 – 28. More on that later.

    He bases the manifesto on the statements of another mathematician named Bob Palais, who is a research professor at the University of Utah.  He suggested that “π Is Wrong.”

    Here’s the basic argument among mathematicians regarding pi and tau (π and τ).  And trust me, I do mean basic, because as soon as I see integral and sigma symbols on a page my eyes start twitching and I black out.

    In short, pi is not a important or significant number, according to Hartl.  It is actually only half of the actual significant number, which is tau.  In the manifesto he argues that pi is not the true “circle constant” because it is the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter.  The true circle constant is the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its radius, which is tau.

    Since the radius is half the diameter, tau is double pi.  Pi = 3.14 and tau = 6.28.  June 28th.  Are we on the same page now?

    People who follow this belief about tau have attempted to rid March 14th of its distinction as Pi Day and instead refer to it as “Half Tau Day.”  They believe that the world has an irrational love affair with pi, so we can’t shake what is actually a maddening way to calculate things.

    I submit that “Pi Day” is so popular because it is equated to “Pie Day,” but that’s just a speculation.

    Our society’s craziness, as explained in the manifesto –

    What is really going on here is that, at its core, π is half of something. It’s the something that is fundamental, not π. And yet, when looking at the various equations of mathematics, even after reading this manifesto you might be tempted by the thought that the difference between π and τ isn’t really that important after all. You may find yourself saying, “Both numbers are important: sometimes π is better, sometimes τ is more natural, and sometimes they are equally good.”

    This line of thinking misses the point. Imagine we lived in a world where we used the letter h to represent “one half”, and had no separate notation for 2h. We would then observe that h is ubiquitous in mathematics. In fact, 2h is the multiplicative identity, so how can one doubt the importance of h? All mathematicians and geeks agree, h is where it’s at.

    But this is madness: 2h is the fundamental number, not h. Let us therefore introduce a separate symbol for 2h; call it “1”. We then see that h=1/2, and there is no longer any reason to use h at all. Arguing that π is important in mathematics is the same as arguing that h is important. Well, yes, lots of formulas contain a factor of 1/2, but that’s no reason to use a separate letter for the concept. The same goes for π: if the notation did not already exist, it seems unlikely that anyone would see fit to invent it. π, like our hypothetical h, is superfluous: h is just 1/2; π is just τ/2.

    When you think of it that way, it does begin to sound a little backwards.

    But the real question is whether or not Tau Day will catch on the way that Pi Day has.  Pi Day is huge on the interwebs.  It’s only in its infancy as a celebration, but how does Tau Day stack up?

    Well, Tau has been trending on both Google and Twitter all day.  And the video below is gaining some viral steam.  The video, entitled “What Tau Sounds Like” is a musical representation of the first 126 decimal places of tau.  The artist, Michael John Blake, also musically interpreted pi, but that video was taken down due to a copyright claim.

    Yes, someone thinks they own the rights to the digits of pi. Here’s what Blake has to say about that case on his YouTube channel –

    Lars Erickson, composer of the “Pi Symphony” is suing me because he believes he owns the melody you get when you convert the digits of Pi to music. What he thinks he’s going to gain from suing a broke musician is beyond me, but his misguided notions of justice will be put in their place sooner or later. My legal team is presently working on my defense of this ludicrous claim, but the fact that this little song I made is now a federal case is just so stupid.

    The song is quite beautiful, and pretty melancholy. Check it out –

    Will Tau Day truly catch on? It’s too early to tell. But I’m sure its chances would rise if someone created a delicious dessert called Tau.

  • Ask Taps YouTube API For Enhanced Video Results

    Online video continues to blow up, and a lot of startups are capitalizing on it. Ask says that as a Q&A site, it sees a larger percentage of “how to” questions around art, science, cooking and exercise that are “begging to be answered visually.” With that in mind, the company is taking what it says is a first step to making video a more integral part of its Q&A community.

    It is doing this by integrating Google’s YouTube API into the Ask.com user community. When a user includes a YouTube link in their answer to a question, the response will include a full thumbnail and metadata info, including playback for the video within the page (similar to Facebook’s display). Video will be infused across Ask’s Answer products and web results. Ask’s “Smart Answers” will now more heavily embed video, and overall results will enable full play back of video on the results page.

    David Amato, Director, Business Development at Ask tells WebProNews, “The API allows us to do a few things differently; most importantly, it will be easier for us to feature and scale video content across our site, both within user-generated answers and algorithmic responses. Currently we see around 1 million clicks a month go to YouTube to watch video; this will allow users the full video experience in the context of an answer to a question, right on the Ask.com site. And yes, this integration is a first step in laying the groundwork for richer video features down the road, such as the potential for users to record and upload their own video answers.”

    Ask Uses YouTube API

    Ask says the news is simply a first step of a “multi-pronged approach to integrate videos in various ways (that recording and uploading of video answers straight from mobile and desktop devices will come later this year).

    “Video is hugely important for our users, and it’s becoming more critical for our partners as well,” Amato tells us. “Partners in our Branded Q&A pilot program will be able to distribute any of their own video assets in response to relevant questions from our growing community. Our Smart Answer units will showcase video directly within the answer itself, enabling partners who supply content to these units to present users with more helpful detail.”

    When asked about mobile, he says, “These features are less relevant on mobile devices, most of which have the YouTube video player already embedded. That said, we will be adding video thumbnails to relevant answers in our iPhone app soon. We’ve also optimized video results in our recently launched smartphone-friendly site to include images that, once tapped, trigger the player to launch.”

    Last month, we had a conversation with Ask CEO Doug Leeds. We asked him where Ask will be in another 5 years, and he didn’t mention video, but he did say, ““There is a huge opportunity before us. The Q&A category is bigger than ever because no one has cracked this quite yet – and we are in an excellent position to do so given our approach and history with the consumer. Also, you’ll see us continue to invest in mobile over the next five years, as Q&A behavior increasingly translates to mobile devices. We have a pretty aggressive mobile product roadmap. I’d like to see us as the dominant provider of mobile Q&A services a few years from now.”

    Ask.com had over 60.5 million unique monthly visitors in the U.S. alone in May (Compete), and that’s up from the previous month. To put that into perspective, Twitter.com had only about 29 million. AOL.com only had about 49.

    The YouTube API functionality will launch later this summer.

  • Final Cut Pro X Skewered By Conan O’Brien

    Just a few days into the release of Final Cut Pro X and the reviews are still pouring in. The new editing software has been radically redesigned and the change is causing quite the backlash from the internet community. Many of the complaints can be summed up with this tweet from yesterday – “Final Cut Pro X is an enhanced iMovie with loss of professional control. Plus old projects won’t open?! HUGE FAIL.”

    While there are some that praise the new software for its relatively low price point ($300) and its simplicity and ease of use, a quick scan of Twitter reveals that a majority of users find it to be frustrating.

    It currently has a 2 and 1/2 star rating in Apple’s Mac store. The top three customer reviews lament the fact that many preferences and professional features are gone and one of them simply says “Extremely buggy, overly simplistic.”

    The Twitterverse is still on fire about Final Cut Pro X, here are some selected tweets –

    Final cut pro x = iMovie Pro.. Im sad for professionals. 2 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

    I’m desperately looking for a site that answers all the “how the fuck do I do this” questions generated from “upgrading” to Final Cut Pro X 2 minutes ago via Power Twitter · powered by @socialditto

    Sometimes I’m glad I edit in both Final Cut & Adobe Premiere Pro. It comes in handy when one of them decides to self-sabotage their product. 51 minutes ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    If even Conan is making fun of the new Final Cut Pro, I’m definitely sticking with version 7: http://t.co/9IXrAF2 (via @Ihnatko) 32 minutes ago via Twitter for Mac · powered by @socialditto

    That final tweet is referring to last night’s skewering of Final Cut Pro X by Coco. He sets up the clip with the premise that his editors are the best in the world, and they love the new Final Cut. The clip that follows is a mess, as you might expect. Check it out –

    In this period of freak-outs, The New York Times’ tech guy David Pogue offers some reason. He goes through a pretty extensive list of complaints about X and debunks a good deal of them. He has this to say in the end –

    Apple has followed the typical Apple sequence: (1) throw out something that’s popular and comfortable but increasingly ancient, (2) replace it with something that’s slick and modern and forward-looking and incomplete, (3) spend another year finishing it up, restoring missing pieces.

    Professional editors should (1) learn to tell what’s really missing from what’s just been moved around, (2) recognize that there’s no obligation to switch from the old program yet, (3) monitor the progress of FCP X and its ecosystem, and especially (4) be willing to consider that a radical new design may be unfamiliar, but may, in the long term, actually be better.

    How do you feel about Final Cut Pro X? Let us know in the comments.

  • First World Problems Rap: A Funny Take on One of the Internet’s Most Beloved Topics

    I’m ready to make a declarative statement: One of my favorite things on the interwebs are First World Problems – few trends blend humor with social commentary so perfectly. Of course, you don’t need the internet to rip someone when they complain about their over-privileged existence, but social media has really taken the phrase and made it indelible.

    If you are unfamiliar with the whole First World Problem thing, it is basically any statement that makes you seem out of touch with the real problems of the underprivileged. Urban dictionary says that they are “problems from living in a wealthy, industrialized nation that third worlders would probably roll their eyes at.”

    For instance, “Dammit, my iPhone has the weakest battery life ever” would be a first world problem. It would be fun to think of these all day, but I’m sure most of you are familiar with First World Problems, so I’ll move on.

    First World Problems have had an enduring internet presence for years. Maybe not as important on the interwebs as bacon, but close. First World Problems has a popular tumblr blog, a featured Reddit thread, and a Lamebook-like collection of social media First World Problems site called White Wine. The latter, of course, is a little less politically correct term for the trend.

    However, the place where First World Problems is really a star is on Twitter. The hashtag #firstworldproblems will see about 20-40 new tweets roll in every few minutes.

    And the best part about the trend is that it is perfect self-deprecating humor. People are aware that their lives are easy compared to the less fortunate. Sure, the joke is a little insensitive, but it’s always damn funny. Here are some of the current complaints from the advantaged masses –

    I went to refill my medication last and found that my drug plan now pays 100%. I got my debit card out for nothing. #FirstWorldProblems 1 minute ago via TT Commander · powered by @socialditto

    My Words With Friends rack has 6 vowels on it, making it difficult to close the 91-point lead @ChasePSU has over me. #FirstWorldProblems 25 minutes ago via Seesmic Desktop · powered by @socialditto

    The water at works makes funny-tasting tea. I can rarely bring myself to make it. Wishing I had another mug from home. #firstworldproblems 25 minutes ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    It takes too long for my phone’s check-in app to work when I’m listening to music. #firstworldproblems 1 hour ago via Tweetbot for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

    Today, this video is making the rounds. It was uploaded by YouTube user funnyz, who is a 17-year-old kid named Zach who calls himself a parody maker.

    It’s pretty funny. Check it out –

  • Churchill Downs Tornado Damages Stables, Frees Horses

    Last night Louisville, Kentucky was the latest city to make tornado news, as a series of storms hit Kentucky Derby site Churchill Downs.

    Although the tornado damaged buildings and threw debris around the track, nobody was reported injured as a result of the storm.

    “Several barns have been damaged, some substantially,” Spokesman John Asher told Reuters. “There’s a lot of debris, the power is out.”

    Officials had to evacuate about 150 horses and 100 stable workers who have homes situated on the grounds. All the races scheduled for today have been cancelled, but they expect to resume racing tomorrow.

    All in all, 9 barns were destroyed in the 110 mph winds accompanying the tornado.

    Tornadoes always make for compelling user content, as amateurs take out their cameras to document the impressive storms. While the YouTube videos for the Churchill Downs tornado are not as widespread or ultimately as impressive as user-videos from places like Sedalia or Joplin, the uploaded videos so far show both the formation of the funnel cloud and the damage to the barns.

    This video show the entire formation of the tornado as it swirls in the sky. Note that once the video hits about 1:57, you begin to see the tornado touch down and debris begin to fly. Whoever shot the video was pretty close to the tornado.

    This video shows the size of the tornado and it’s relation to both Churchill Downs and Louisville Cardinal Stadium.

    This last video show the damage close up to one of the barns –

    Luckily the tornado only did physical damage and didn’t hurt anyone. It’s been a crazy year already for tornadoes, with towns in the South and Midwest still trying to pick up the pieces. Although this tornado didn’t cause catastrophic devastation, it did hit one of our country’s historic landmarks. Plus, living in Kentucky, you rarely see something like this.

  • Erin Andrews Is Still Pissed About That Leaked Internet Video

    Note to people trying to be funny and/or cute at someone else’s expense: Sometimes, the sensitivity of things never goes away. Just ask Erin Andrews. In case you aren’t aware, Erin Andrews is an ESPN personality who is very popular with the fellows. A quick look at her in the lead image gives you a good idea why. She’s an attractive blond who can talk about sports in a manner that appeals to guys, and so, before the infamous video hit, Andrews was one of the more popular personalities on ESPN.

    She’d won a number of “hottest sideline reporter” contests — not that that mattered to Andrews — and was quickly transitioning from attractive sideline reporter to sex symbol. So much so, in fact, Michael David Barrett decided the best way to serve the public was to film a naked Andrews through her hotel peephole and release the video to the public. This story has been well documented, and unfortunately, the aftermath seems to have lessened the natural zeal Andrews had during games she covering. It’s hard to blame her, however, knowing her privacy was violated so completely, the resulting sex offender punishment for Barrett seems just and reasonable.

    The following quote from Andrews, taken during Barrett’s trial, demonstrates her disposition:

    “I am subject to crude comments,” she told the court in December. “I walk into stadiums, and fans make crude comments to me. I have nightmares about this sexual predator.”

    Those comments were made during March of 2010. Thanks to a video that appeared on Deadspin, it’s clear Andrews still has to deal with morons who are trying to be cute and funny:


    In case you can’t make out what’s going on, what we have is Andrews appearing at the College World Series, and, naturally, some of the male fans are trying to get her attention. In this case, the guy filming — or at least narrating — asks Andrews to sign his friend’s baseball, which she politely declines. The scorned friend then says something along the lines of “That’s OK, I’ll just watch your video tomorrow” or something similar.

    What an effective way to prove Andrews’ point, guys, because if there’s one thing I’m sure of in this life, it’s how women like to be reminded, nay, heckled, for situations that resulted in sex offender punishments for the guilty. It’s actually surprising Andrews was as calm as she was, but then again, going back to the comments she made during Barrett’s trial, she’s probably used to it by now, and that’s almost as unfortunate as her invasion of privacy — one the Internet reveled in, including this particular writer.

    That’s right, I’m just as guilty as anyone else who saw the video. The difference being, I’m not trying to remind her of her ordeal. Making fun of something so obviously painful just to be witty for your buddies filming their latest user-generated content submission is awfully weak. Good thing the YouTube comments called them out, as well:

    Made fools of yourselves now did ya – all you accomplished was to show Erin Andrews has more professionalism and class than you clowns ever will.

    And:

    Awful human beings

    There’s also some contention about the video’s title — “Erin Andrews vs 12yr old about video” — because, it seems, the video’s title was done in such a way as to portray Andrews as the bad guy here. Um, yeah. About that… While it’s doubtful the mouthy fan was as young as the title suggests, that isn’t the point. If he can dish it out, he damn well better be able to take the consequences, 12-year old or no.

  • Football Cops: The Manning Brothers Fight Crime With Tight Spirals

    It looks like the NFL lockout has forced the Manning brothers to seek other employment.

    In an advertising campaign for DirecTV, Peyton and Eli Manning have teamed up to fight crime with nothing but their rocket arms and a couple of black footballs.

    DirectTV has launched the season one trailer for “Football Cops” on YouTube and also put up the official site for the show. “Nobody escapes the long arms of the law,” reads the tagline.

    Here’s the official show description from DirecTV –

    Peyton and Eli Manning star in this action-packed drama about two former pro football players who bring their unique brand of law enforcement to one of the country’s toughest neighborhoods. Mike Tahoe (Peyton Manning) was living the dream as a big league quarterback, until a personal tragedy brought him back to the mean streets of his childhood. Vowing to bring those who wronged him to swift justice, he enlists the help of his best friend, and biggest rival, C.J. Hunter (Eli Manning). Both grew up together as orphans in a home for wayward boys. Both overcame the odds to become huge sports stars. Now both are the only hope for the rugged streets they once again call home.

    Sounds better than half the cop dramas currently on TV.

    The trailer itself does not disappoint, as the brother quarterbacks impale the bad guys with footballs, all while gloriously mustached.

    Of course we can’t expect the Manning brothers to actually star in a football themed cop drama, but I would totally watch this if it were real. Maybe DirecTV has plans to turn it into a very short web series? The site shows 3 separate episodes upcoming for season 1.

    However, If they did in fact turn this into a true feature-length show they would have to work on the realism. Eli doesn’t throw one interception in the whole clip. Pfffft.

  • Britney Spears’ New Video “I Wanna Go” Pays Homage to Half Baked

    Britney Spears’ New Video “I Wanna Go” Pays Homage to Half Baked

    It’s Britney, bitch. And she’s tired of your f*cking questions.

    At least that’s the message in her brand her video for the song “I Wanna Go” from her Femme Fatale album. The video begins with Britney at a press conference answering ridiculous questions from the media about her Brad Pitt love-children and whether or not she hates puppies.

    Her reaction to these questions is to channel Guillermo Diaz of Half Baked fame and quote the film word for word as she tells off the nosy reporters – “F*ck you, f*ck you, f*ck you, you’re cool, f*ck you, I’m out.”

    Find out all the answers to your burning questions right here in the #IWannaGo video. I LOVE it & hope you do too. -Brit http://t.co/UMic2hy 9 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    The video turns out to be a dream sequence co-starring Guillermo Diaz himself as her male companion. We all know by now the troubles Ms. Spears has had with the paparazzi in her career, so it should be no surprise that this is a major theme of the video.

    Check it out below:

    As far as the review for the new video, I’ll defer to someone with more Britney knowledge than myself, Megan Gibson of Time

    “I Wanna Go” continues the futuristic theme that “Hold It Against Me” and “Till The World Ends” relied heavily on. Though this time around the futuristic aspect is slightly more subtle (though much more bizarre) as it’s revealed that the paparazzi are actually cyborgs in disguise.

    And while the product placement is not as in your face as it was in “Hold It Against Me”, we still get some up close shots of the Volkswagen emblem and… milk.

    And of course, while it’s disappointing that there’s no dance sequence at all, at least we don’t have to cringe through the half-hearted steps that Britney’s subjected us to in her two previous videos. In fact, despite the lack of dancing, Britney seems pleasantly energetic and spunky in “I Wanna Go” which is a comforting change from her usual blank-eyed look.

    Is Britney making a comeback? Who knows – nothing is really out of the realm of possibility when it comes to American culture and its spastic palette.

  • Weird Al Channels Lady Gaga in Perform This Way

    The video that was almost never released has hit the interwebs. In Weird Al Yankovic’s latest parody, he transforms Lady Gaga’s personal expression anthem “Born This Way” into a funny and highly creepy send-up of the absurdities of her fame.

    A few months ago, Weird Al was forced to put his parody single “Peform This Way” on YouTube in an unofficial capacity due to disputes between his camp and Lady Gaga’s camp over the rights to the song. Weird Al’s camp claimed that Gaga refused to allow him to parody her song. When audio hit YouTube with the disclaimer that it would not be appearing on his new album Alpocalypse, the internet protested. This outcry led to the realization that the dispute between Al and Gaga was never a dispute to begin with.

    Here’s what Weird Al had to say on his blog

    After putting my Lady Gaga parody on YouTube this morning – and announcing that it wouldn’t be on my next album because Gaga didn’t approve it – there was a huge outpouring of disappointment from the Internet.

    Apparently the fact that she didn’t approve it was news to Lady Gaga herself!

    Gaga’s manager has now admitted that he never forwarded my parody to Gaga – she had no idea at all. Even though we assumed that Gaga herself was the one making the decision (because, well, that’s what we were TOLD), he apparently made the decision completely on his own.

    He’s sorry.

    And Gaga loves the song.

    And now, about two months later we are treated with the video for “Perform This Way.” In the video, Weird Al’s face is added to a woman’s body dressed in a wide variety of ridiculous costumes. The best part of the video in my opinion is the pesky Madonna character who keeps showing up and getting in “Gaga’s” way. Gaga has previously called the comparison between “Born This Way” and Madonna’s hit “Express Yourself” “retarded.”

    Check it out –

    In an interview with Wired, Weird Al said that “Twitter saved his album.”

    I remember very clearly the morning that I uploaded the song thinking that my album was postponed indefinitely and that this song that I’d been working on for weeks and weeks was never going to see a proper release. And within a few hours everything had turned around and my fans had my back and Lady Gaga heard the song and all the sudden I had permission.

    It was just an amazing turn of events. By the end of the day I had a release date for the album. The byproduct was that people found I was doing the song and doing an album. I never court controversy, I don’t like drama, but that’s just the way it happened.

    It’s amazing. Twitter saved my album. In the old days that wouldn’t have happened. I’m just thankful that people cared enough to help me out.

    Oh, the power of the interwebs.

    I’m just glad the whole thing was sorted out. With the Roger Ebert / Bam Margera feud in full swing, I don’t know if we could have taken a Weird Al / Lady Gaga battle.

  • Lindsay Lohan Lands Her First Acting Job Since House Arrest

    Who said a little court-ordered downtime would stop Lindsay Lohan from acting?

    Today she unveiled to the world her new role – as a spokesperson for online penny auction site Beezid.com.

    Lohan (or, LiLo as the kids call her) has been serving a brief house-arrest sentence since May 26th. She was charged with stealing a necklace from a Venice, CA jeweler, plead no contest, was fitted with an ankle bracelet and ordered to spend 35 days inside her home. This means that she’s just over a week from freedom, sweet freedom.

    But it looks like LiLo couldn’t wait to get back in front of the camera. She sent out this tweet a little while ago –

    What’s a girl to do when she’s at home? Jump online to Beezid.com and get shopping! @beezid http://t.co/6jsUpte 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    From that tweet we are directed to a brief commercial for Beezid.com, filmed from Lohan’s pad. Beezid.com is a small increment auction site that uses a bid system. Users register, purchase packages of “bids” and then use those bids to attempt to snatch up items for super-low prices.

    “During some of my time at home, I found this amazing site with great deals – it’s called Beezid.com. Be sure to check it out,” she says. Check out the short ad below –

    What did Beezid pay Lohan for the sub-15 second YouTube ad? $25,000 plus a $10,000 credit on the site. And you thought you couldn’t hate the world any more than you already do.

    Remember, children: Crime doesn’t pay – unless you’re famous.

  • Vancouver Healing Begins With Apologies That Go Viral

    The post-Stanley Cup Finals riots in Vancouver, among other things, has made for some really good web content, giving the audience a closer look at the chaos that went on. Now, that the childish acting out has subsided, the city is beginning its healing process, and while this will probably continue throughout the summer, some olive branches have been offered by Vancouver residents who are looking to change the perception left by the Stanley Cup riots.

    Meanwhile, perhaps the lead image, via reddit, sheds some light on why the riots happened. We were led to believe it was fans behaving badly after their team lost to the Boston Bruins in Game 7, when, in fact, a rampaging Tim Thomas was trying to destroy Vancouver and the residents simply panicked.

    Considering Thomas’ sterling goal-keeping against the Canucks, perhaps the image isn’t that far-fetched, at least on a metaphorical level.

    As for the healing process, it has already begun in earnest as Vancouver residents are eager to put the ugly incident behind them. Of course, social media has played a big role in the recovery process, with Facebook playing a big part in the organization of clean-up efforts — the page in question has over 17,000 likesTwitter was also leveraged. While these kinds of responses are to be expected in today’s world, another area of healing that may surprise you comes from the avalanche of hand-written apologies notes from various residents.

    Instead of posting apologies on the two social media platforms, relying on technology to do the deed, many people hand-delivered their message directly to the authorities in made-for-the-Internet moments that resonate almost as loudly as the kissing couple. The first wave of apologies came in the form of sticky notes left on a Vancouver police squad car. While the idea is a great one, the images are even better:

    Sticky Notes

    Sticky Notes


    Images courtesy of here and here.

    That’s not the only hand-written apologies that popped up around Vancouver, either. There’s also the “Citizen’s Wall,” a plywood barrier that’s covered in hand-written apologies and other self-incriminating messages. The entire wall can be seen over at Gigapixel, and it measures in at 877 megapixels (107,271 X 8,173). Gigapixel’s “image” of the “Citizen’s Wall” is made up of 472 separate images. An example of the notes:

    Sticky Notes

    There’s also a video of the clean-up process, but the noticeable thing is it has much less views than the images of the riots themselves. Apparently, chaos is good for almost 200,000 views, while goodwill is only worth a little over 400.


    Whatever your feelings about the riots and/or the rioters, you have to admit just how effective social media on the Internet is for keeping up with this stuff. I can only imagine what the content would’ve been like if Twitter/Facebook/YouTube had been around during the Rodney King riots. We’d have enough stuff to write about for the next 10 years if that were the case.

  • Lost’s Doug Hutchison, 51, Marries 16-Year-Old Aspiring Pop Singer

    There are two sure things about the internet. First, it loves a good piece of gossip. And second, the community holds no punches. When a 51 year-old actor marries a 16-year-old with some questionable music on YouTube, you can be assured that the internet community will jump on it like hungry jackals on a piece of meat.

    The 51-year-old actor in question is Doug Hutchison. He may well be best known for his role as the disgustingly wormy Percy Wetmore from The Green Mile. Recently, he starred as the Dharma Initiative’s Horace Goodspeed in Lost. But his best role (according to me and other sci-fi nerds I’m sure) was Eugene Tooms in The X-Files.

    The sixteen-year-old girl in question is Courtney Stodden, a model and former Miss Ocean Shores Teen USA contestant. Her official site lists her as recording artist and gives a link to her YouTube Channel. There we find a few videos of her tracks “We Are America,” “Don’t Put It On Me” and “Car Candy.” It’s also made clear that Courtney “writes, composes, and records all of her own music.”

    Some people are calling her an aspiring country singer, but after giving “Don’t Put It On Me” a listen, I wouldn’t describe it as country. Take a listen yourself –

    This writer will refrain from judgment. Here are the most recent comments on YouTube –

    Remember what I said about the internet? Sheesh. The Twitterverse is none-too-kinder about the news. The two most common reactions seem to be disgust at the age difference and uncertainty about the bride’s age. Some of the best tweets make reference to Hutchinson’s roles on Lost and The X-Files

    Big ups to Doug Hutchison for topping the ick factor of Eugene Tooms and marrying a 16 year old! 1 hour ago via Twitter for Mac · powered by @socialditto

    … and you thought Benjamin Linus was the creepiest guy on the island…
    http://t.co/NFG1PBL 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Starring in BATMAN & ROBIN is no longer the worst thing Doug Hutchison has done with his life: http://bit.ly/l0R63v 2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    And these Twitter users (among many others) question the fact that Stodden in really 16 –

    51 year-old actor from The Green Mile/X-Files marries a 16 year-old that looks like she’s 56 http://bit.ly/l2Bl9d 54 minutes ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    http://t.co/wJtuJfN
    No way this girl, Courtney Stodden, is 16, #WhatTypeOfNonsense 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    The girl admittedly looks a little older than 16. But it could just be the makeup or the tanning – who knows? See for yourself what all the buzz is about –

    The couple told E! earlier today that they were “aware that their vast age difference is extremely controversial.”

    “But we’re very much in love and want to get the message out there that true love can be ageless.”

    Her parents did in fact sign off on the wedding. Although the age difference is pretty substantial (if she’s actually 16), it is legal. What if, and let’s be optimistic here for a second, they actually do love each other? Couldn’t there be worse things in the world that two people who care about each other getting married? I mean, the internet was a tad less derisive about Hef’s almost marriage to a woman 60 years his junior.

    Okay, who am I kidding – it’s pretty strange. And it kind of reeks of a publicity stunt, am I right?

    There is one thing we can say with certainty. The internet definitely does not approve of the union.

    [All Images From Courtney Stodden’s site]

  • Happy Fathers Day From The Beastie Boys

    The Beastie Boys have sure embraced viral marketing in past few months. They made a splash back in April when their star studded “Fight For Your Right Revisited Trailer” blew up the interwebs. The video, which served as a promotion for their then upcoming album Hot Sauce Committee Part Two, featured the likes of Seth Rogen, Jack Black, Will Ferrell and Danny McBride.

    “Just in time” for Father’s Day The Beastie Beastie Boys have released a new video to promote their new album. This time, they are promoting the June 21st release of Hot Sauce Committee Part Two on vinyl. Yes, I am aware that Father’s day is this Sunday, June 19th. I’m sure the Beastie Boys are as well. Let’s not let math get in the way of this.

    Your Dad puts up with enough of your shenanigans, why not aggravate him some more on Father’s Day? http://t.co/9Kl3Xxf 1 day ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    This one isn’t star studded, but it is so awesomely strange that it quickly makes up for that. A happy family sits down for a nice cookout, but things get interesting when dad starts to grill his vinyl collection. Check it out below –

    So forget the coupons for a free car wash. Forget the ties, #1 Dad shirts and executive pen sets. Your father really wants some Beastie Boys. The album, released May 3rd in the U.S., has received pretty universal acclaim. This writer has regrettably failed to find the opportunity to give it a thorough listen, but I might have to remedy that this weekend.

    This classic gem has put me in a great mood, enjoy – ALI BABA AND THE FORTY THIEVES!

  • Sony Tablet Ad Is Beautiful, Mysterious

    Sony is gearing up for the release of their upcoming tablets, the S1 and S2. According to a private note acquired by Engadget, it looks like the S1 will most likely be available for pre-order in August and release sometime near the end of September.

    The S1 (codenamed) has a 9.4 inch screen and has a sort of wedge shape, according to initial hands-on reports. According to Sony, the inspiration for the slightly thicker end came from the way people hold magazines in one hand. Of course, you fold the magazine around on itself creating one thicker side, and it makes it easier to hold. Sounds good to me.

    The S2 will have a clamshell design and feature two 5.5 inch displays. They can be used to display the same image or work independently of one another for multitasking purposes.

    Both tablets will reportedly be integrated with PlayStation functionality, as you might expect. The PlayStation controls will appear on the touchscreen, which might annoy some users who like the feel of the controls. But hey, you can’t have a joystick sprouting out of a tablet, right? Both will also run on Android OS.

    Sony has just released an ad on YouTube for the tablets called “Two Will.” They say that it is the first installment in a five-part series. “Look out for the coming episodes” they say. The ad itself is purposefully vague but it is beautiful and intriguing. Check it out below:

    What do you think? YouTubers’ opinions range from “Coolest f*cking promo ever made” to “I hope the train is a little faster in the next episode.” Many say that it rips off a famous ad from 2003 called “The Cog” by Honda. True, they both feature Rube-Goldberg devices, but I wouldn’t call it a rip off. “The Cog” seriously is an amazing commercial, however.

  • Rebecca Black’s Friday Gone From YouTube

    Say it ain’t so!

    It looks like, at least for right now, you are going to have to rely on parody videos to get your “Friday” fix, as the official video has been pulled from YouTube.

    The much loved, much hated viral sensation had over 167,000,000 views at the time of its disappearance. The official video, hosted by ARK Music Factory, is no longer available and will instead show you the all too familiar “meh” face along with the explanation “This Video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by Rebecca Black.”

    So it looks like Miss Black herself took the video down. Earlier in the week, TechCrunch happened upon the official video when it was being presented as a $2.99 rental. It didn’t stay that way for very long though. It’s possible that it was simply a glitch at YouTube, but it’s also possible that ARK Music set it up that way to either turn a profit or get people talking about the video again. Pulling the video altogether would also be quite the PR stunt. We’ll have to see if that’s what this is.

    YouTube has given the same generic statement to both TechCrunch and Mashable, saying –

    YouTube takes copyright infringement very seriously. When we receive a complaint alleging that a video infringes another person or company’s copyrights, we remove that video. Users who believe that a video was removed in error can appeal the copyright takedown.

    Awesome, thanks for the info YouTube.

    Of course, this now begs the question – What in the hell are we going to do to celebrate the weekend at the workplace? For instance, your annoying office-mate is no longer going to be able to blast it at full volume at soon at 5:00 rolls around. What will step up to fill the viral void left by this removal?

    For now, all we have are the parodies. And this one with improper lip-reading is by far the best (Rebecca Black says Nazis). Enjoy.

  • JK Rowling’s New Harry Potter Site Pottermore Boasts Upcoming Announcement

    Harry Potter-mania has to be the the most long-lived hysteria that I’ve ever lived through. Since the publication of the first book, through the movies, and up till now, fans of the series remain thrilled with any new development in the world of Hogwarts. Take for instance the bestseller status of a tiny collection of companion material know as “The Tales of Beedle the Bard” or the opening of the Wizarding World of Harry Potter Theme Park. Yeah, the boy wizard is still pretty popular.

    Potter fans may now have something else to focus their internet attention towards, other than making Twitter trending topics out of Ron Weasley and Luna Lovegood. A mysterious site has popped up called Pottermore and the only thing on it is “coming soon” and JK Rowling’s signature.

    The site was unveiled by a Harry Potter scavenger hunt, where map coordinates were placed on various fan websites like The Leaky Cauldron. Nine were placed on these sites and the final one was tweeted out yesterday on the newly established Pottermore Twitter account.

    That tenth secretstreetview.com location you were looking for… here it is! 53.476311,-2.22971 #pottermore 21 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    The coordinates, once entered into the search box at secretstreetview.com, would reveal a photoshopped letter on some Harry Potter-themed site. The “M” in “PotterMore,” for example, was a reference to Manchester Station where JK Rowling first conceived the idea to write the beloved novels.

    If you click on one of the owls on the Pottermore website, you will be directed to a YouTube page called “JK Rowling Announces.” It doesn’t say what, only contains a countdown clock that now reads about 6 days, 10 hours until her announcement. The poster profile says that fans will be able to watch her announcement exclusively on the YouTube channel.

    So what in the mudblood could this site be? Rowling’s lawyers have said that it is not a new Harry Potter book. The Leaky Cauldron has this to say –

    Speculation on the trademark information of Pottermore has also been making its way around the internet. The info, which was registered in 2009, says that Pottermore is trademarked for, among other things, multiple-user networks, online boards, digital audio, printed books, toys, retail stores, and more, and more, and more – in short, pretty much everything. We don’t feel this gives much direction one way or the other.

    Right, that points simply to a giant fan site, possibly a Harry Potter themed social network? If Call of Duty can try it, so can Harry.

    Gizmodo says that an anonymous tip told them something about a Harry Potter branded smartphone. Now wouldn’t that be interesting?

    What do you think the new site will be? Something magical I’m sure. Are you excited about all new things Harry Potter? Don’t forget, this comes out very, very soon guys…

  • The Internet is My Religion, One Man’s Speech on the Power of Connection

    Wow, this makes two feel good internet stories to come along today. First, Redditors help a man crowd-plan his derailed wedding and now we have this speech about the way the internet connects us all and helps us achieve great things.

    As part of the Personal Democracy Forum 2011 in New York, a developer and startup founder Jim Gilliam told his story about his battle with cancer, his loss of faith, and his “new religion” that comes from the people of the internet.

    When Gilliam was young, he was a conservative Christian under the Jerry Falwell umbrella. He says he loved “Jesus and the Internet.” He even fixed Falwell’s computer once, he says. But when he was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins Lymphoma, he lost that faith. In the video, he talks about his battle with multiple types of cancer and how the internet eventually ended up saving his life.

    I wont spoil the story for you, but let’s just say he needed a huge procedure done and the community on the internet helped him out. This led him to believe that “humanity connected is god” and also to declare that “internet is my religion.”

    His speech has gotten some big time attention. It was blogged about on Oprah’s blog and Twitter star Alyssa Milano gave him a mention just about an hour ago.

    This video is worth your time. “The Internet Is My Religion”➛ http://bit.ly/mzPVLq /via @Jason_Pollock 1 hour ago via Twittelator · powered by @socialditto

    The whole speech is worth a watch, as it’s quite an incredible story. But if you want his “argument” if you will, here’s the biggest part of it –

    The truth is we all have this same cross to bear, we all owe every moment of our lives to countless people we will never meet. Whether it’s the soldiers who give us the freedoms because they fight for our country, or it’s the surgeons who give us the cures that keep us alive. We all owe every moment of our lives to each other. We are all connected, we are all in debt to each other.

    The internet gives us the opportunity to repay just a small part of that debt. As a child I believed in creationism – that the universe was created in 6 days – today we are the creators. We each have our own unique skills and talents to contribute to creating the kingdom of god. We serve god best when we do what we love for the greatest cause we can imagine. What the people in this room do is spiritual and profound. We are the leaders of this new religion. We have faith that people connected can create a new world. Each one of us is a creator, but together, we are the creator.