Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Linkedin Park #FailedTechBands
“Say no to Lindsay Lohan” – Drugs
Bruce Bingsteen #FailedTechBands
So Chris Brown got in a fight and Lindsay Lohan was found unconscious in a hotel room… What an ODD week this is turning out to be!
Instead of seeing ROCK OF AGES I’m just gonna burn 12 dollars in the sink while watching a gif of Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah’s couch.
Bristol Palin seems like the type of girl who says “irregardless” a lot.
Depeche Safe Mode #FailedTechBands
Someone should take all the paparazzi footage of Lindsay Lohan and just release it as the next Final Destination movie.
99% of all people listening to Hoobastank right now are having their deli meat sliced.
Horrible experiences make you stronger. Like your parents getting murdered. Or having AT&T.
Insane Klout Posse #FailedTechBands
A handprint in clay is a great Father’s Day gift from a three year old. Kinda creepy from a thirty year old, though.
You can draw dicks on your baby’s face while they’re sleeping. It’s not illegal.