Adam Sandler Updates “Chanukah Song,” Adds Disgraced Subway Spokesman Jared Fogle to Lyrics

Adam Sandler has once again updated his popular “Chanukah Song,” and this time he’s added disgraced former Subway spokesperson to the lyrics. Sandler first performed this updated ver...
Adam Sandler Updates “Chanukah Song,” Adds Disgraced Subway Spokesman Jared Fogle to Lyrics
Written by Kimberly Ripley

Adam Sandler has once again updated his popular “Chanukah Song,” and this time he’s added disgraced former Subway spokesperson to the lyrics.

Sandler first performed this updated version at the “Judd Apatow and Friends” Carnegie Hall performance o November 14th. He also recorded a YouTube version at San Diego’s Civic Theatre.

Adam Sandler debuted the original version of his “Chanukah Song” back in 1994.

The new lyrics are hilarious.

Put on your yarmulke, here comes Chanukah
So much fun-ukah to celebrate Chanukah

Chanukkah is the Festival of Lights,
Instead of one day of presents, we have eight crazy nights.

When you feel like the only kid in town without a Christmas tree,
Here’s the fourth list of people who are Jewish, just like Jesus, Olaf, Punky Brewster, Scott Rudin, and me!

Joseph Gordon-Levitt enjoys eating kugel
So does Stan Lee, Jake Gyllenhaal, and the two guys who founded Google
Adam Levine wears a Jewish star
So does Drake and Seth Rogen
Goldberg has a gold yarmulke to match the belt he won from Hulk Hogan

We got Scarlett Johansson, talk about a Kosher crush
And if you need a higher voice to turn you on, how about Geddy Lee from Rush?

We may not have a cartoon with a reindeer that can talk
But we also don’t have polio, thanks to Dr. Jonas Salk (smart Jew!)

Put on your yarmulke, it’s time for Chanukah
Harry Potter and his magic wand-ukah, celebrate Chanukah

Jared from Subway: God dammit, a Jew
But guess who’s Jewish and can fix him? “Loveline”’s Dr. Drew (get on it doc!)

Princess Leia cuts the challah with Queen Elsa from “Frozen”
David Beckham is the king of soccer studs and also a quarter chosen

Ron Jeremy is fully Jewish and so is his foot-long buddy
Shia LaBeouf is half a Jew but 100 percent nutty

It’s cool that Santa Claus who makes Christmas so merry
But we get two jolly fat guys: ice cream’s Ben & Jerry (both Jewish!)

From New York to Iran-ukah, get up and celebrate Chanukah
Don’t mess with us, oh Chanukah, let’s all get along for Chanukah
So drink your Jaegerbomb-ukah and smoke your medical-chron-ukah
If you really, really wan-ukah, have a happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy Chanukah.

Jared Fogle was recently sentenced to 15 years in prison for having sex with a minor and for possession of pornography. Subway severed ties with Fogle when he was first suspected of pornography possession. You must admit, Adam Sandler including him in these latest lyrics is both gutsy and an excellent slam.

What’s your take on Adam Sandler’s latest version of his “Chanukah Song?” He previously altered the lyrics in both 1999 and 2002.

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